Where To, Bud?

Got my letter of denial a week ago and I can appeal. A friend of mine also said that I should have my local Congressman do an inquiry and we're going to do that as well. This just gets "better and better", doesn't it? No job, only a small pension and facing bankruptcy next month. While I'm at it, I may as well tell you the rest. I had D admit me to Ridgeview Institute for suicidal ideations and regulations of my meds which I had been cutting back on to save money. I spent 4 nights there and got out the 23rd. No, I didn't do Christmas with the family. I stayed home and played my guitar. Even though they they upped my meds, I'm still pretty much an emotional train wreck and I wasn't going to "snow" on anyone's Christmas Parade. The family understands how things are with me, but my little grandson Julian doesn't. Don't bother laying a "guilt trip" on me or telling me that I was "depriving" him of his "Opa...

Click on the title above for a message from my favorite redhead, Becks . I chose the country version, but there are a few others. Here's one with Becks and her mother Sylvia who has Alzheimer's. Cute, huh? You'll need to copy and paste the below link to see those two cuttin' a rug! http://elfyourself.jibjab.com/view/dEsBfryp1PUtT62K Thanks, Becky and that's a very handsome picture of your Bill "Der Erste Bill" ("the first Bill") from Scotland! DAB ("the OTHER Bill")

From Luke and Helga in Australia. The video says it all: Happy Holidays from Bill and Dondra

Miss me? I'm baaaa-aaaaack! Read by clicking the TITLE line above: And y'all prolly need to listen to this replay of one of my favorite all-time SONGS! I spent a little time on "The Green Mile", but I'm back for the holidays, so here's THIS! height="344"> It's okay to close your little eyes and rock back and forth, if y'all wanna..... Thanks and don't forget the four-footers! For the animals always Bill

D asked me to accompany her to our Methodist church's Christmas dinner (I am not yet a member there, being that I was raised Catholic), but I couldn't handle it. I did the best I could. Smiled and said hello, but other than eating and smiling at the kids who enjoyed their gifts, I just could not do it. Was it the fact that D and I cannot spend a Christmas with friends and family back home in Germany this year? Heretofore, I have always been able to make a trip home to Rothenburg at this time of year, and this time, as I was married, I would not have had to go by myself! Was it the fact that Betty couldn't be there with her Wayne? The Dementia? I used to be able to speak in front of large crowds and felt comfortable talking to them. Hell, I don't know. All I know is that the tears spilled out, but I kept them at eyelid level. Now I am facing a family Christmas on the 19th, and I would give anything not to have to go, but D is hitting me over the head with the fact that...

I am having some issues with volume on my microphone, so please stand by. I have a bunch of stuff written which I want to share with you, but we may be going to another blog adress very soon. google, as y'all know, has taken away the moneys meant for AD Research and Paulding Humane Society. I am being told it's because of my WARNING that the content here is only meant for adults, but I think that's a bunch of BULLSHIT! NO ONE advised me that I needed not to include advertisers for y'all to click on! NO ONE! But I did get a response on the google forum and she told me all was okay. Y'all saw that, right? Then I got another response telling me it wasn't okay! WTF ?????? This was to be my Christmas Present (small though it may have been) to Alzheimer's Research and the Unwanted Pets!!!!! God, I'm wore out. Totally. Please click to feed 'em! So many of them get "turned in" daily, and so many of them have an "expiration date"! T...

Watch it closely the first time...... Then watch it closely again. They're cold, hungry and alone Jesus Christ, google. Jesus Christ.

I have had my ad sense account disabled. These are the ads which are revenue-generating and which last Wendesday came to the following amount: At that point I put through a request for payment of $100.00 - $50.00 of which was to go to Alzheimer's Research amd $50.00 to Paulding Humane Society. Yesterday I received the following notification from google: ==================================================================================== Google AdSense to me show details Dec 4 (2 days ago) Hello, While going through our records recently, we found that your AdSense account has posed a significant risk to our AdWords advertisers. Since keeping your account in our publisher network may financially damage our advertisers in the future, we've decided to disable your account. Please understand that we consider this a necessary step to protect the interests of both our advertisers and our other AdSense publishers. We realize the inconvenience this may cause you, and we thank you in...

And if, like me, you have "trouble" with the holidays, you don't have to be alone, you can be with me ! Virtually, that is. The Internet. A private chat, just us. Lotsa jabberin'. Come on in and "set" a spell. What I'd like to do is create a temporary chat room for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day for those of us who get the blues at Christmas. See, I'm one of those people too, and you'd be helping me by giving me something to do and somebody to do it with ! (minds outta the gutter chirrun!:)) A lot of what could happen depends on y'all wanting to do this and how MANY of you want to do this. It wouldn't be a voice chat, unless y'all want it to be, so it would be just us, but that too is open to discussion and change. I just need for y'all to leave me a yea or nay in the comments , because there's no use me sitting here waiting for someone to come online when I could be working on something else. We'll set up a time via a ...

Such as this guy: That was an excerpt from a DVD/Book he wrote, but pretty much puts it all into perspective, as far as I'm concerned. What he is telling us is what I would like to say as well: "I'm still intellectually "sound", so as long as I have that "soundness of mind", even though it frustrates me, wait and let me come up with the word I can't remember. If I can't, I'll ask you for help." ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- This doesn't happen very often, but recently I linked you to a site which purported to explain the difference between "dementia" and "Alzheimer's Disease". My counsellor, Suzette read that link, decided there were some things written there which weren't all together factual, and sends us the following clarification. In retrospect, had I not been so all-fired anxious to get away from the bright screen because of the eye infection...

It took a little longer than expected, but we're very close to an "air-date" of what (for now) I am calling "Where To, Bud? - The Podcast". What I have done thus far: 1. Narrowed down the choice of servers (3) using the following criteria: a) Cost b) Ease of Operation (for me) c) Amount of Bandwidth Cheap is better than Free in that I get more time Free is better than cheap, since I don't have to worry about a subscription fee. The easier this podcast will be to operate, the free-er I will be to talk to you. Since it won't be "live", I will have plenty of time to edit and tweak, so what comes out on the other end hopefully will be informative as well as entertaining. I plan to draw on my 15 years as a broadcaster/talk-show host to make it as professional a production as I can. By that, I mean I'm not going to sit here and make jibber-jabber "small-talk". The show will have been prepared and edited before-hand, but will be presente...

Eye infection is back, this time with a vengeance, and, as I can barely stand to sit at the computer for very long, this one will be short and sweet. Going to the opthalmologist(?) Monday to see why this keeps happening. I sleep with a cold washcloth over my eyes and we have some Decadron ointment, but it only lasts about an hour, and as it is a steroid, I can't take it too often. D and I thought it might be because I spend so much time on the computer doing research (otherwise known as playing World of Warcraft), but we're not sure. My computer stays on 24-7 (heretofore, I mean), but I am going to start shutting it down and see what happens. I hope I am not getting allergic to Bert. He's a long-haired domestic, but we keep him brushed regularly. I wanted to re-visit the definition of Dementia vs Alzheimer's, and rather than write it all out myself, I want to link you to a very informative site. Just click on the blog title to take you there. I didn't know this on...

I had an episode a few days ago during which I couldn't reason something out and I didn't realize it until today, when I wrote it down "by the numbers". For example: 1. I've never seen a purple cow pause....... think, Bill ! 2. I never hope to see one 3. But I can tell you anyhow 4. I'd rather see than be one The episode didn't involve the above rhyme, of course. It had to do with a poll I created and that I didn't reason through, so the third choice made no sense in opposition to the other two. This negated the whole damn thing, causing me a lot of embarrassment, because people were voting anyway, even though it didn't make sense, I think, just to spare my feelings, God love 'em. That's one thing. Here's another: We have discussed before that sometimes a word will "fail" me, right? Well now words fail me as I'm writing them. See that word "choice" up there? Well, I used it because I forgot the word "...

My niece Lisa (I've spoken of her before- the stage manager at 7 Stages in Atlanta?)and I spoke together today at TG Dinner and I mentioned that I missed acting, but was reluctant to try out for anything produced in community theatre because I'm afraid I might forget my lines. So she suggested I write my own play about Dementia and perhaps have it produced at 7 Stages with all proceeds going to AD Research. It would be one act for one night only and I already have a "working title" for it: 7 Stages Theatre Presents I Can't Remember! A Comedy In One ACT All Proceeds To Benefit Alzheimer's Research Featuring Bill Craig Before you give me your opinion, I have already begun to write a few lines, and it is not my first effort at writing a short play. I once (in college) wrote the dialogue for a 20 minute film entitled I'll Show You Mine shot in 16mm as a silent film with the lines written on placards (I was on a "Low Budget" back...

.....and when I had my radio talk show here in Carrollton, the day before we always did a segment called, "What Are You Thankful For?" So if it's okay here's my list. They're not in order of importance okay? EVERYONE I mention is equally important! 1. First of all, for D, who has been just super to me and whom I love very much 2. For our son Jason and our two grand kids, Amber and Julian. 3. For all of you who follow this blog, of course and doing what you can for the animals by clicking oh the link. I really look forward to your comments and really like to answer you. 4. For all my Doper friends. ALL of them! Even the ones who disagree with me or may not like me. The Straight Dope is a "safe haven" for me, since I'm kind of a "recluse" these days. 5. For my in-laws. Especially my sis-in-law Ramona, who has given D and me the upstairs of her home for very little rent. Yeah, it's kinda crowded and we have a lot of furniture in storage...

And I just shut my pie hole? Enjoy. These are some of the tunes I used to listen to, late at night, on my transistor radio (with ear-plug!) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2oFESUMWhU (sorry, copy & paste, please!) And one more....... Tuesday's just as bad. Worried about my D. We can't seem to get her BP meds "regulated" just right, and her "bottom" just drops right out from under her sometimes, her face goes pale, and I cannot seem to do enough to make it go away. PLEASE don't forget the four-footed ones???? In addition to asking you to click and vote, I am now going to ask you to volunteer your time at a local shelter. Can y'all do that? If not, could you just take 'em some food? Find a shelter in your area and just take a bag of food, please. Click here for an easy and free way to help care for those in need at The Animal Rescue Site! They HAVE no one else! They have no one else. Thanks Bill and Bert

1. As I write, it is 7:45 Saturday morning, and I just returned from the local Angel Food Ministries with my box of 10 frozen dinners. Loaded 'em into the freezer and now I'm set for at least 10 days of good eatin'. Before I went in, I zipped my hoodie up, put the top over my head and put on my mirror shades and kept my head down. Kinda like a burka, only different. Y'all do believe that, right? Of course I didn't do that! You think a guy who just asked hundreds of people to help him with his financial life is gonna balk at picking up some cheap food? Ya' kiddin' me? I even helped 'em unload and stayed to help distribute! It's been tough, letting go of the pride, but you gotta believe you'll come back and do some good for someone else again one day. 2. I have yet another sleep study scheduled on 11.23.09. Apparently the results of study number one were inconclusive, although D, (who is herself a polysomnographer, which is a fancy term for som...

Just got a message from Becks, and apparently I kinda got my "wires crossed" about DEB (Bill from Scotland), so try to follow along as I try to get myself out of this "mess", okay? 1. Yes, he is Becks' guy and he lives in Scotland and among other things, is a guitarist/singer. 2. But he doesn't have an internet radio station, another guy from the US does and goes by the name "djsarg". 3. Because I put two and two together and came up with 5, I mistakenly thought Bill had AD, which he does not. djsarg, however, does and posts on the Alzheimer's forum about his radio station on the web. Becks helped him post on the AD forum a couple of times, just as she has helped me with my probs. 4. Bill from Scotland also helped me (through e-mails) find sarg's station, which is another thing that threw me off the track. 5. Jesus, what a cluster-eff, huh? But that's my life these days. 6. My apologies for the misinformation, but the stuff about my ...

Don't know exactly when it will air yet (still working out the details about downloading all the software and stuff), but in addition to talking about Alzheimer's/Dementia, there will be appropriate music in between. I used to be a DJ/talk show host/news director, so I know how to jabber. I just need to keep it interesting. Length? Don't know yet, maybe 20 minutes? Can y'all stand me for that long? Times? Well, I'll let y'all be in charge of that since you can listen any time you wish. If you choose to book-mark me, that may make it easier for you as well. The blog will remain and I hope to be able to embed the podcast from here. The only problem with that may be if I have a sponsor or sponsors for my show, which means they will foot the bill (very nominal), and I don't know how google will take to that idea. An alternative would be to launch directly from which ever podcast platform I choose and link y'all from there . In other news, looks like Bi...

This below is from my dementia counsellor Suzette: I know it seems very self-centered, but I just didn't ever "feel" like participating and I am sorry about that, but I still do have my own fund-raising effort going on. When I get $100.00, $50.00 goes to the animals and $50.00 to Alzheimer's/Dementia Research. We're currently 75% of the way there! Maybe one day, I will once again be in a position to do more. I sure want to. Edited To Add: I just wanted to let Suzette know that both D and I appreciate her being a constant source of comfort to us with phone calls e-mails and very informative links. This is also true for my friends Becks, Margaret, Skericheri, Kemi, all my Doper friends and my friend in Germany, Jo (if I forgot someone, please know it wasn't intentional and correct me, okay?). I may sometimes forget to mention it, and seem wrapped up in what's going on with me, but I appreciate and love all of you for coming here and reading. ===============...

I'm an unemployed medical professional. I have only COBRA insurance until the end of this year (my birthday - how ironic is that?) Right now, thanks to my sweet wife and a small pension from 17 years of employment, it's "affordable" at $139.00 a month. After that, unless the President signs a bill extending that, it jumps to $380.00. When it does, I will no longer be able to afford medical care for my dementia. That means no more prescription meds, (currently running $80.00 a month, not including doctor's visits ($40.00 co-pay - $30.00 for my psychiatrist). My SSDI is still pending, I am not eligible for Medicare, I cannot afford life insurance, can't get food stamps (our combined income doesn't meet the $1500.00 cut-off). Medicaid? Still waiting to hear. I can't even die without being a burden on my family. No life insurance. Bankrupt. I have limited myself to one meal a day so that we can save money, in opposition to my wife's wishes. I just don...

In order to keep my RT license current, I need to work on some CEU's (need 30 by the end of the year), so I may not have a lot of time for entries here. In addition, I'm involved in the translation of some post-WWII German correspondence for a friend of mine from the Dope , which I am very excited about, so that's going to take up some of my "slacker" time, which I sorely need. Please keep on feeding and voting, thanks! Here's one for all my air-guitarist friends. You may wanna "toin" it up! Thanks! Bill

Enjoy! Please drive carefully tonight and watch out for the little ghouls and ghosts as they go in search of sustenance! In town, less than 10 mph has always worked for me! Also please watch out for any little "four-footers" who might be along and accidently get in your way! Remember, they need your help to eat, and Paulding Humane needs your vote! Just click on the link..... And once again, "The Mahster Mohnsta" Happy Halloween To ALL our DOPER / DOMER and other sweet friends, from Bill, Dondra and "Bert"!

Well, it's been a hectic and disappointing week, but one perseveres as best one can, yes? 1. We don't qualify for food stamps, because D and I make too much a month. Never mind that we both have medical expenses out the ying-yang (which is located near the "ol wazoo", remember?) a car payment, my COBRA insurance, gas, car insurance, groceries and rent and related living expenses, our combined income is over the 1500.00 a month limit so we don't qualify. 2. Filled out the Bankruptcy papers this week and paid the lawyers. This was something that really shook me up emotionally. Last year at this time, my credit score was in the high 700's. Today it's in the low 400's, and in a few months, it will be 0, I reckon. Friends and family have been most supportive (especially The Dopers , who helped with the funds for said Bankruptcy and so many other things,), but ya know? It still hurts when you buy stuff, make all the monthly payments and then suddenly stiff y...

In my last entry, I told y'all about Angel Food Ministries and how for $28.00 ($30.00 if ordered online) I could eat 3 prepared meals a day for a month , right? Riiiiiiight , Dude! Now come on ! 90 meals for only $28.00????? The box has 10 prepared, frozen meals, Bill, you "Shankipottamus" ! Do you see what's happening here? I am not thinking things through ! Here's something else: After D and I first divorced, I was living pretty much on the cheap, so I decided to start clipping coupons? I was a clippin' MoFo too, Dude! That first Sunday, I clipped every damn coupon I could find, and the next day went to the supermarket, loaded up the buggy, got in line, and after the cashier totalled the order, I handed her a fistful of coupons with a big ol' grin! Well, she starts scanning them and then stops and asks me "where's the stuff these coupons are good for?" Huh? "Well, I thought I clipped the coupons out of the paper, hand them to you an...

This afternoon I had an appointment with my Ortho pae dist. Well, lah-dee-frickin'-dah ! When did that job description pick up an extra a ???? So next week I have an appointment with my Daentist . ("Hey! Let's go with the Greek spelling and F V ck 'em out of some more bucks, Biggus Dickus! Y'ont to????") No, that's not what I'm Bastarding (got to give us guys equal time, Bitches! Juuuuuuust kidding , Honey!) about, y'all. What's frosting my balls is the fact that today , my Orthopaeeeeeeedist decided I needed a "brace" for my ankle. Not a cast , mind you; just a "brace" made of: Nylon, Velcro, a cotton "sock" (cut off a thing that looks like toilet paper), and a shoe string. Now before I ask you what you think that "brace" cost me, just take a minute and look at the "ingredients" (Nylon, Velcro, Cotton, Shoe String) One hundred and thirty nine dollars. $139.00 One-thirty nine. Sounds really ...

My COBRA insurance (heretofore affordable at 139.00 a month) runs out at the end of December (after that it's $380.00 a month!), so today D and I picked up applications for Medicaid (for me) and food stamps. We'll be turning those in tomorrow. In addition, I checked with Consumer Credit Counselling Service in Atlanta (you have to, before filing for bankruptcy) and they referred me to Angelfood Ministries. (Click on the title of this blog entry to go there). This is a place where you can order prepared meals (3 a day) for a fraction of what you'd pay at the grocery store. I qualify for the senior citizen package which only costs 30.00 ordered online. The good news about Angelfood is that ANYONE can take advantage of this service. You don't have to be poor, demented and delapidated like me. The food stamps, Medicaid and Angelfood will go a long way in taking some of the financial burden off my wife. This way she won't have to worry about fixing me anything to eat (you...

So first, here's a picture of "The German Boy" after his sleep study! Puffy eyes, no make-up, no lipstick, no eye-shadow, hair all matted-up, but I had some GREAT dreams. *LOL* We'll know the results in two weeks, but my Polysomnographer told me I entered into "severe apneic territory" several times during the night! Pulmonary Oxyen Saturation dropped to 72% at one time. (Normal for me is 92-96% or greater). 72% is heading toward respiratory arrest. So this is the latest I am doing about this! I still have so much to give! Okay Eff all of that shit! Just help me take care of feeding the 4-footers, please? Remember to click to feed and vote for Paulding Humane! They were the first animal welfare group I became associated with and they are near and dear to me. Thanks! B~

Gonna see how much of my depression/dementia may be due to sleep apnea. Gotta be hooked up to some wires and monitored all night. I'll be back Sunday night and let you know how it went. "Fixin'" to walk out the door. Don't forget to click to feed and vote for Paulding Humane Society! We have people from all over the world helping with this, so please remind your friends, okay? Thanks Bill

This is part of something I wrote on another message board with some editing, okay? -------------------------------------------------------------------------- My very good friend on the Dope, Oakminster , brought this to mind when he shared this in a thread of mine called "Your Favorite Commercials". Okay, I have already mentioned that my American soldier Dad brought me and my German Mom and brother to the US in 1960. At that time, I still spoke with a very heavy German accent and did my best to try to fit in. One of the ways was to "go out" for "Midget Football" and it was my first encounter with who would prove to be an inspiration to me and I am sure many others: Coach Roger Sauls who passed away last year. Coach was very patient with me, teaching me the "ins and outs" of throwing and kicking that strange looking egg-shaped ball! In those days, a lot of little boys went out for it and we all had our heroes on the Villa Rica Wildcats Varsity t...

If you don't see a blog entry for a while, don't be concerned, okay? I have a lot of things I need to take care of this week which entails lots of paperwork and research. I hope to be back Sunday night. Indeed. Thanks Bill Please don't forget to click and vote, and ask your friends to do the same! Thanks again!

They're still very infected and I am still having to keep antibiotic ceam on the bottom inner and top inner eyelids, so I can't sit at the computer for very long. Back soon! Thanks Bill

Okay, back from exam number two. Again, a very friendly doc (we actually attended West Georgia College at the same time!) who asked all the right questions and (I hope) got all the right answers. The exam, however, was very cursory: No blood work, no "snap" of that rubber glove, and no Bill (in a falsetto voice) yelling, " Oh.My.Gawd ! Are you gonna stick that big ol' thing in MEEEE?" I was actually looking forward to doing that, but maybe it's good that it didn't happen, because they might have thrown me out on my ass if it had. One thing that did happen was an x-ray of my arthritic right hand. Specifically the right middle finger which will just not bend, and which, if I still drove, would have served me well in traffic! I had forgotten that I mentioned that in my history, but apparently someone thought it was significant, and by golly, it is ! When I worked as a respiratory therapist, it was one of my jobs to manually resuscitate a patient in an em...

Today was my psych exam, and the preliminary diagnosis was, "Your'e crazier than a shit-house rat!" Just kidding! (thanks for the image, Becks!) The testing today was almost the same as the one in August except this time D was there and had to fill out a questionnaire (in a separate room), but was in the room for the "history" of all of this, so if I got something "wrong" she would correct me. However, I'm just as drained now as I was that first time. Also, I expected hostility, but didn't experience any of that at all. My psychiatrist and test administrator were very pleasant and fair in their questioning and paused when I couldn't remember something or got "choked up" and couldn't speak. I'm going to keep this one "short and sweet", but I wanted to thank my friend and "teacher", Ms. Becks for the homework assignment of documenting the hell out of "what a long strange trip it's been"....

....but here's a "taste" of what it might have been like on the way to my beloved Rothenburg ob der Tauber. The last time I was home I had my rental Mercedes up to 125 mph on the Autobahn, and I was screaming like I did the first time I went sky-diving. Apparently, though? I was still driving too slow for my fellow countrymen/women, 'cause they were coming up behind me in the left lane, honking their horns for me to get my sorry ass over!!!!!!!!!!!! Demm Krazzy Churmans! You are watching KRAFTWERK , the PIONEERS of "Techno-Pop" and you will see much more German "Techno" to come. Especially at Halloween! Please remember them! Thanks Bill