Okay, this is going to take some 'splainin': See, a long time ago, I was being seen by a counsellor who told me I had "Peter Pan Syndrome", which is a pop-psychological term for men who have never grown up, and which describes me, kinda.
My last significant other was many times heard to say, "You are such a baby!!!!!"
Me: "That's not a term of endearment, is it?"
Or: "That's so juvenile/childish!"
Me: "Well, I was someone's child, ya know!"
So that describes my behavior and my love for comic books, toy trains and computer games.
It also explains why I get along so well with the kids I see in our ER: I just seem to be able to talk to them on their level, I guess. It also explains why I become "sullen" when I don't get my way.
I hasten to add that PPS is not accepted medical terminology. It's just a coined phrase used to pigeonhole men like me (and I'm sure there are women who have this as well. What do we call that - "Wendy Syndrome"?
So what does that mean if I suddenly go apeshit, full-contact Alzheimer?
Probably that some poor soul's gonna have their hands full, unless I die from something else first.
I have never acted my age, never. First of all, I don't look 58, and secondly I don't want to act my age, even at the times I feel like I have to, and that's why things often don't work out for me.
At first glance, one may think, "Well, it's good that he thinks young!", but it's really not, because I can't seem to balance the adult and the child. I'm much more comfortable with the child which makes the "real" adult not be able to see anything except in blacks or whites.
So I'm seeing this counsellor now, and we talk about those things, and I am given books to read (more "pop-psychology") and exercises to do, and I am trying to be more adult when and where I need to be, but with this other (AD) shit going on, and not knowing from one day to the next if I'm going to screw up something, it's really tough dealing with.
And we really can't separate the two, can we? I mean, like some judicial sentence, they run concurrently, don't they?
So this is me, peeling back one more "layer" and letting y'all take a look at the whole Bill.
One week away from Christmas Eve! Got everything bought yet? I'm decorating the "Hell-Hole" for my grandson Julian's visit and I'm getting excited too. Just like a ........ little kid! :)
Thanks for the visit and enjoy the music!