Monday, November 3, 2008

Last Will, LIVING Will And Other "End Games"


Working on that this week. Not being morbid, just want to have that stuff out of the way so that I can concentrate on other things, like surviving this beast of a disease.

One thing I haven't lost, and that's my libido. Did lose it for a while (due to depression meds, I think), but it came back, and that is not necessarily a "good thing". With the AD, I can think of no good reason to become involved in another relationship. I wouldn't want to do that to someone.

So , what : Self-Gratification? Use myself? :) Send myself flowers, a dinner, a movie, and then "Hey YOU, I just spent $100.00 on you! Lay your ass down! No way am I goin' home empty-handed!" (excuse the bad pun!) ;)

Do I sound sarcastic? Yeah, I do sarcasm very well these days, I reckon. Gotta work on that a bit.

It's a beautiful Georgia day, and I'm gonna get on my Trek 1000 and do some cycling. I hope the weather's nice wherever you are, and that you'll get out and soak up some sunshine too.

Meanwhile, here's a link if you'd like to get to know me better: I hope to do this again next September, if, that is, I remember how! ;)


Late this afternoon I got into a "cleaning frenzy". I use the word "frenzy" because that is what it became. As always, I began in the kitchen and was going to work my way back to the bedrooms, but it quickly became something which had no rhyme or reason and I began rushing from one thing to the next, not remembering what it was I had been doing until I saw evidence of it not having been done, so I went back to that.

This is very unusual for me, because I have always been described as "anal" and very exacting in my tasking, but lately I don't clean at all, until I get into one of these "frenzies" and then I try to do it all in an OCD-kinda way, but never without "rhyme or reason", like today.

In the midst of it all the trembling started, and this lately has been the rule rather than the exception. Being home is not comfortable. Being at work is.

Have a great week!



Anonymous said...

Hey Bill,

We have three dogs. A Chocolate Lab, Yellow Lab and a miniature Long Hair Dachshund. My wife and I are happiest when our dogs are happy!

Bill, I hope that you can move on from your ex-SO. It is not good for you to face this AD shat alone. I know that I'd be on a world of hurt without my wife of only 7 years. Gerry (yes, Tom & Gerry!) is a rock that I can count on.

I can't see any problem with becoming "involved" when you know that you have AD. Just make sure that the lady knows it up front. Let her make that decision!


Anonymous said...


I tried earlier to add a comment but I see that it was never posted. Must have broke my finger off in the wrong hole.

I sure hope that you can move along from the looser SO. I see no reason not to allow yourself a new relationship. Just make sure the lady knows about the AD up front. be your own light heart ed self and let her make the decision. I could not begin to be able to tell you how much my wife means to me. We have only been married seven years. Gerry (that is right... Tom & Gerry) is a large source of strength.

What is your plan of action? We need to figure this out.

Bill Craig said...

Hey Tom! :)

First of all, thanks for being my friend! Even though you and I have never met, I feel we are close, and I appreciate your assistance and advice very much indeed!

Dear Tom (and Gerry, if she's listening in), what would you have me do - join and place a check mark by the question "Do you have Alzheimer's?"

Tom T, I just would not do that to a lady. I KNOW you care about me, and I thank and love you for it, but that just isn't an option - sorry.

Thanks for caring about the animals! It sounds as if they are y'all's babies, for sure, and if there is any way I can make that ride next September, I will want y'all to send some pictures for the website.

Lastly, about the "EX-SO": She is a wonderful person, and yes, I feel left, but I also understand why, and it's okay.

I love you guys a whole bunch. Let's just hang together and take coconut oil baths, okay?

Alles Gute