Thursday, March 29, 2012

Full Blown Panic Attack About An Hour Ago

I've never really had one and this was a doozie, folks. Right down to the rapid breathing, rapid heart beat which I could feel as a flutter, and sweating.

It happened while I was fixing my daily meds for the next week. Some of them sound alike to me and some are almost the same shape and color. For example, "Metaprolol" and "Meloxicam", "Lamatrogine" "Losartan" and "Lovastatin".

I had several partial bottles of the above meds, and wanted to combine them and then it happened. I put the Losartan into the partiall full Lovastatin bottle. Luckily just to make sure everything was cool, I checked all the bottles I had combined with the description of each pill, and couldn't find the Losartan. That's my blood pressure pill and I never miss a day.

And there I went. Checked, double checked, triple checked. Nothing.

I'll spare you the swearing, but believe me, it was there, as was the throwing of the empty bottles against the wall, so they could be eliminated.

Today was the day I picked up my refills and at first, I believed the pharmacist had forgotten to add those to my purchase. But no, the bag was there and the drugs had been checked off as having been the correct ones.

My daughter in law, (Susan) came into the bedroom, calmed me down, set me down, had me find the
empty Losartan bottle and describe what the pill looked like (it's white and oblong and small) as she began separating all the pill bottles onto my bed. She poured them all out and looked at them and put them back. Finally she found my mistake and all was well, as I slowly settled down and stopped my chattering, my pulse slowed to normal (right around 60 is normal for me) as did my breathing.

As I write this, I feel okay except for a splitting headache for which I just took something.

During my time working in the ER, I saw many people (brought in by ambulance, some of them), and I took all of them as seriously as I would have anything potentially dangerous to the patient. A cardiac event can sometimes result, or may even be the cause.

What I said at the outset of this entry is true, I have never really had one, though I thought I did. Looking back, I believe they were more temper tantrums than anything else, but now that I've been through one, I know now what it feels like, and friends, it doesn't feel good.

So no more preparing my own meds and before you suggest it, yes, I do have one of those daily compartment thingies. Gonna make a list of what and when and let Susan or Dondra help me.

Sorry if this seems a bit disjointed, but I'm not going back to edit this. It's the result of what it's like afterward, and I'm a bit disjointed right now as well.

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